Pros
PRO: We just disregard orders from the top. Whenever Accenture Leadership asks us to undertake a job and no one gets fired. This is a incredible job pro, where I can disregard any task that would actually lead me to do the job. PRO: I get free training, travel, benefits and other expenses that I want despite the organisation losing almost half a million usd a month owing to bad iDefense leadership. PRO: Whenever I want and nobody cares, I can take PTO. PRO: Despite the lack of cyber skills, knowledge, experience or credentials, I am "fast tracked" to a Cyber Security Managing Director position. PRO: I can derail, snipe and literally sabotage every session to which I am invited, and no one can prevent me. It's so liberating! PRO: I can literally lose 70% of our customers in a year without replacing any of them with fresh customers, and I still receive excellent results reviews! Customers said they'd rather unsubscribe than hear my voice again and I'm getting bonuses! PRO: I get a nice office with all kinds of fancy computers and technology I can't work with. I've literally never learned how to use a keyboard and can only type with 2 fingers and don't know anything about computers, but at Accenture I'm a senior cyber safety supervisor –and I'm treated like I'm a super intelligent specialist and my opinion matters! PRO: Whenever I feel like it, I can come in and leave. Nobody's keeping track of my work. PRO: I get to have 4 hours of conferences where I hold individuals hostage and at the end of the day I get to go home feeling like I'm so intelligent and productive! PRO: I can create continual mistakes in the workplace, turn them late, and generate work that is below norms – and no one is concerned about it. PRO: I can literally do the opposite of what my peers want, and everybody forgets about it and always does what they want. PRO: I can behave stupid and incompetent whenever I'm called out to dodge any accountability and it always works! PRO: I literally don't have any good finished projects or anything to demonstrate for at the end of each year – yet everybody is still good to me and I can continue to do what I do best.
Cons
CON: They haven’t promoted me to managing director of the organization yet, and fail to recognize my brilliance. CON: Management hasn’t done enough to stop every employee I have ever managed from hating me and running away. CON: Management will be more concerned about dealing with this glass door post than actually remedying the situation in the company.